The journey begins..
- There are lots of things you can do to prepare for your baby's arrival.
- You have maybe already thought about what kind of dad you will be. Take some time to observe other dads in action and see how they interact with their children, how they communicate with them, how they deal with the various dramas and incidents that arise. Do you notice how some dads are very good at spotting when things are getting a little out of hand and can take action to avert the crisis. Becoming observant is a really good skill to learn. You will learn a lot from being around children of all ages. Visit places where you can observe families going about their business, either on your own or with your partner. Do this when you are relaxed and can spend some time and reflect on what you observe; the interactions between children and adults and between children themselves. Chat with your partner about what you have each observed.
- Visit friends and family who have children, talk to them about the challenges. If you get the chance, try holding your friends' baby and watch how they change a nappy and generally care for their baby.
- Try this; pick up a cushion or pillow; hold it like you would a baby (more on the caring for your baby page); walk around with your "baby" in your arms; chat to your "baby". Any practice you can do now will help reduce the anxiety that many dads feel before their baby is born. You might feel a bit silly walking and talking to your "baby" but practicing will help you feel more confident when you do hold your baby for the first time.
- Check out some places where you could go with your baby when you are ready for outings. It can be great if you have a few places in mind, know the layout and how long it might take to get to each place. Is there somewhere you can change your baby's nappy if the need arises? Imagine yourself there with your baby. When you do get there in the coming weeks, think how great that will feel!
- Talk to your partner. Do you share a similar vision of what kind of family life you want to have? Have you thought about parenting styles? Are there things you could sort out before the baby is born?
- Have you discussed how you will support each other in the early days when you get home with your baby? What will you each need?
- Have you considered the possibility of your baby being ill when it is born? Or the possibility that your child could be stillborn or not survive for long following the birth? How would you feel about that and what would you do? For more details on the support services available to help parents in such situations, follow the link.
Practical things..
Try to come up with a plan so that you are both getting some decent sleep. Everything is more manageable if you are not too sleep deprived. If your baby is being breastfed, make sure mum is getting a chance to catch up on sleep - taking baby out for a walk can give mum time for a nap. As your baby gets into a routine, you could take night time baby care in turns so that every second night, you will get a chance to catch up on sleep. Naps are also a great way to meet sleep needs; maybe one of you takes over while the other takes a nap. You can relax and sleep when you know your baby is being cared for.
Image:grandparents | Flickr - Photo Sharing!www.flickr.com
If a relative or friend is offering to come stay and help out, it is a good idea to timetable this so that rather than having everyone around helping all at once, there will be help over a longer period of time. |
Being at home all day managing your baby's needs can be tough. When you are back in your own work routine, be aware of being home to help out when you say you will be. Planing a realistic home routine helps you to commit to and enjoy sharing the care of your baby. Image: Church clock © Andrew Whale cc-by-sa/2.0 :: Geograph Britain and ...www.geograph.org.uk |
Looking after your relationship with your partner is really important. Knowing it is normal to have disagreements and putting strategies in place to deal with them, makes your relationship stronger. Click on the link above to view some strategies or watch a 2.5 minute video here on strategies to deal with conflict.
Image:Solving relationship problems | Parenting Advice & Community at Parent Nookwww.parentnook.com
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Image: A Different Time: October 2010www.jeffjordanblog.com
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